| I know you're going to find this hard to
| |
| | in an undisclosed place, not exactly
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| believe, but I, Tim Knox, noted
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| | typical role models there.And finally, if
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| humanitarian, former Eagle Scout, and
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| | the Miss America Pageant really is about
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| lover of mankind the world over, am a
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| | brains and not beauty, as promoters say,
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| sexist pig.Sorry, mama. I had no idea.I
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| | I recommended restructuring the contest
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| came to this startling realization after
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| | so the emphasis would be on intelligence.
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| an angry female reader sent an equally
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| | I suggested "...having Miss South Dakota
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| angry email complaining that my recent
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| | and Miss Rhode Island play Risk for
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| column on the Miss America Pageant had
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| | twelve hours with no bathroom break...
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| missed the politically correct bull's eye
| |
| | have Miss Michigan rebuild the carburetor
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| by about a mile and a half.Quoting this
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| | on a '63 Pontiac Catalina... have Miss
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| reader's email now,
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| | California expound on the theory of
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| "...my assumption from how you write,
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| | quantum physics while trying to make a
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| leads me to believe that the "opposite"
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| | Jacob's Ladder with a piece of string
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| gender is little more to you than
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| | that's too short..."
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| something that still needs to be
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| | At no time did I say one negative thing
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| oppressed by men such as yourself that
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| | about women anywhere in this column. My
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| allows you to leer at them from above
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| | arrows were clearly (at least to me)
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| your glass ceiling... Have a nice and
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| | aimed at the hypocritical pageant
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| dolefully sad existence... Best wishes to
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| | organizers who claim beauty has nothing
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| you in actually developing an articulate
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| | to do with who wins. And I will not
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| and EDUCATED opinion... I sincerely hope
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| | apologize for stating the obvious fact
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| you (sic) learn that opinions are
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| | that not even two piece bikinis can save
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| CERTAINLY not facts, and ignorance is no
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| | this dog and pony show whose time has
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| excuse for poor judgment..."
| |
| | come and gone.I finally came to the
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| Man, when it comes to email pipebombs,
| |
| | conclusion that, being an ignorant man,
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| this one's a beaut! Thank you, Mrs.
| |
| | the only way I was ever gonna figure out
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| Kazinski (not her real name, of course).
| |
| | what Mrs. Kazinski was upset about was to
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| Thank you very much. Can someone hand me
| |
| | involve, dare I say it, a woman! So I
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| a bandaid...Call me ignorant (again), but
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| | called out the big guns, the woman who
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| I had no idea what I could have possibly
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| | has been keeping me on the straight and
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| done to demand such brutal retaliation
| |
| | narrow for a lot of years now. Namely, my
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| from someone who is, I'm sure, on most
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| | wife, or should I call her, "my better
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| days, a very decent and loving member of
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| | half.""I don't get it either," my wife
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| the human race. I've seen a woman pushed
| |
| | said after reading the email and the
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| to these limits only once before. It was
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| | column. "Sounds like a disgruntled beauty
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| July 8, 1968, a day I'll never forget.In
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| | queen to me. Now take out the trash
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| a moment of sheer frustration, my mother
| |
| | before I get my big purse after you."I
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| let me have it up beside the head with
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| | don't think my wife realizes that by
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| her big purse because I refused to climb
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| | belittling disgruntled beauty queens she
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| off Billy the Buckin' Bronco, that
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| | has opened herself up to the wrath of the
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| valiant, plastic steed who stood tied up
| |
| | emailbomber. Forgive her, Mrs. Kazinski,
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| out front of the Piggly Wiggly on 8th
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| | please. Her curse is having to live with
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| Street for many years."I ain't gonna tell
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| | me. Isn't that enough?Which brings me
|
| you again to come on, Tim Knox!" WHACK!I
| |
| | around to one more question: If I'm a
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| should've seen it coming. Whenever my
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| | sexist pig why the heck am I the one
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| mama called me by my whole name it meant
| |
| | dragging two hundred pounds of trash out
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| that she wasn't particularly happy with
| |
| | to the curb twice a week. Can't I get a
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| me. It also meant that a whacking from
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| | woman to do this?Look, Mrs. Kazinski, if
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| that big purse wasn't far behind. In
| |
| | thinking that the Miss America Pageant is
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| school, just hearing my name called on
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| | a load of hooey makes me a sexist pig in
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| the roll caused me to uncontrollably duck
| |
| | your eyes, so be it. If reading just one
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| for a good five minutes.Scarred for life,
| |
| | of my columns drives you to conclude that
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| I never mounted another horse, coin
| |
| | I am a man who feels women, quoting you
|
| operated or otherwise. Maybe that's why
| |
| | again, "...need to be oppressed" so that
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| this email bothered me so. Would I ever
| |
| | me and men like me can "...leer at them
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| be able to write another column after
| |
| | from above our (sic) glass ceiling..." so
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| being beaned by this irate woman's
| |
| | be it again. That's your opinion. You're
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| electronic big purse? I wasn't sure.I
| |
| | entitled to it.As a writer whose tongue
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| read the email over several more times,
| |
| | is kept planted firmly in cheek and whose
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| but still my offense was unclear. What
| |
| | feet are kept planted firmly in the muck,
|
| was Mrs. Kazinski so ticked about? I went
| |
| | I know that not everyone will agree with
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| back and read the Miss America column
| |
| | everything I write. A wise, old newspaper
|
| again. Still, I was clueless, which I'm
| |
| | editor once told me that a writer's job
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| sure doesn't surprise my friendly
| |
| | is to elicit a response from his readers,
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| emailbomber. Maybe you folks can help me
| |
| | be that response good, bad, or
|
| figure it out. After all, I'm ignorant,
| |
| | indifferent.With you, Mrs. Kazinski, I
|
| you know.If you missed the column called
| |
| | consider my job to be done.Everything I
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| "The Dust Settles on Miss America" (or
| |
| | write is a reflection of my own personal
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| missed the point of said column) here's
| |
| | opinion of the world. I hope you will at
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| what it was all about:
| |
| | least agree, Mrs. K, that I, too, am
|
|
| |
| | entitled to an opinion, no matter how
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| Promoters of the Miss America Pageant
| |
| | "ignorant and uneducated" you may find it
|
| insist that it is not a beauty contest, a
| |
| | to be.To finish, let me assure you and
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| statement that I took particular
| |
| | everyone else that if I am indeed a
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| exception with. If it's not a beauty
| |
| | sexist pig, I am of the passive pork
|
| pageant, why is there an evening wear and
| |
| | variety. After antique British sports
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| swimsuit competition? Why don't they just
| |
| | cars and well-worn cowboy boots, I think
|
| have a talent show, ask each contestant
| |
| | God's greatest creation is Woman. Man
|
| how she'd save the world, then give one
| |
| | comes in at number 7, just after riding
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| of them the crown so everybody can go
| |
| | lawn mowers and just before all beef
|
| home?In an admitted attempt to bolster
| |
| | hotdogs.If you read this column with any
|
| sagging ratings, Pageant promoters
| |
| | regularity, Mrs. K, you'd know that I
|
| allowed two piece bathing suits to be
| |
| | have a wife and two daughters who seem
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| worn in the swimsuit competition this
| |
| | very happy with me. I also have a mother,
|
| year. And this isn't a beauty contest?
| |
| | sister and elderly aunt who depend on me
|
| Please. I guess nothing stimulates the
| |
| | to be the designated male in their lives.
|
| female brain like wearing a skin tight
| |
| | When any of these women call, I drop
|
| bikini. Odd, it has the exact opposite
| |
| | whatever I'm doing and run to their
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| affect on the average male. It makes his
| |
| | sides. If I don't, it's big purse
|
| mind go blank.I said that I changed
| |
| | time.So, am I really a sexist pig, Mrs.
|
| channels during the talent competition
| |
| | K? I don't think any of the women in my
|
| because badly sung opera and showtunes
| |
| | life would say so.Still, if you still
|
| have been known to induce cranial
| |
| | have a problem with me, maybe you should
|
| bleeding in men my age. I don't apologize
| |
| | talk to my mother.Just watch out if she's
|
| for this statement. I am not a big fan of
| |
| | carrying that big purse.From "Small
|
| opera so even the best of opera, at least
| |
| | Business Q&A" With Tim Knox
|
| to my ears, is badly sung. And I've yet
| |
| | Tim Knox is a nationally-known
|
| to hear a showtune that I can dance to,
| |
| | entrepreneur, author, speaker, and radio
|
| so sue me.I also made mention of the fact
| |
| | show host.
|
| that one of the contestants sported a
| |
| | Tim has helped hundreds of entrepreneurs
|
| pierced navel while another had a tattoo
| |
| | realize their business dreams.
|
